Friday, May 30, 2008

Michelle Malkin and the Ay-Rab Headscarf

Michelle, Michelle, Michelle, you have finally reached the tipping point beyond which you no longer have even the SLIGHTEST remnant of credibility. God is Great! Michelle has decided that Rachel Ray's fringed scarf worn around her neck in a Dunkin Donuts commercial indicates support of Palestinian terror groups. This is such a relief, because up until now, Michelle has maintained a sick sort of credibility, but this puts her firmly in the Mann Coulter Right Wing Nut Job Hall of Fame.

Michelle is a self-hating Oriental woman who wastes absolutely no time making excuses for the excesses of White America. She made a spirited defense of the United States' decision to intern Japanese Americans in prision camps during World War II. She is a Bush cheerleader despite the obvious lies and deception and prevarication that emanate from the black hole that is the Bush 43 administration.

I feel it it necessary to express my dismay that the people at Dunkin Donuts (Donuts are Great!) felt it necessary to cave in to the psychotic rantings of a self-loathing, obviously crazy blogger by pulling the ads with the hideously offensive Rachel Ray in her scarf. Good GOD! She is adorable, what is wrong with them? What a gutless and toadying bunch. Now if she had been wearing Sarah Jessica Parker's green head-thingy that she wore in London at the premier of that movie, Michelle would have had my blessing. I'm sure that was terrorist-inspired.

Oh, anybody know where I can get one of those scarves?

Saturday, May 24, 2008


Three-tenths of an inch of rain. Its a start. I had to just lean back and close my eyes and listen to the sound of it on the roof. Everything is freshened up and there is some hope in the air. The green in the grass looks like it is going to finally overtake the brown, and the tulips that I favored with 2 gallons of water this morning are breathing a sigh of relief. I too am breathing a sigh of relief that I can avoid watering anything, at least for awhile. Rain in farm country comes right after the Holy Trinity; and often, if not ahead of the Holy Spirit, it is neck-in-neck. Without rain there is nothing, and if there's too much, there is nothing. Life and livelihood on the great grassland prairie depends upon its good graces. There is little as demoralizing as a drought, and there is a sickening feeling in the the stomach when you watch the shaggy cattle in the spring fields grow gaunt and hollow-eyed when they should be getting fat and sleek, and the fields of grain wither and die. My livelihood does not depend on the rain; but I was raised here, the daughter of farmers, and I've spent enough time in the fields that I count myself a farmer of sorts. Many of the people I know and love do depend on it, and the rhythms of the land run deep in my heart. It is good to hear the rain.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Rancid Dictators

No, I am not talking about Mussolini or Hitler or George W. Bush. I'm talking about people who INSIST on dictating while eating, their meals. Smack smack slurp suck suck suck. Couple this with the fact that they mostly dictate in broken English, well it would lead one to drink. They are, however, one step above the ones who haven't learned the use of tissue, and we will leave how that sounds to your imagination, because frankly, when I have to think about it, I gag. No good rat bastards is all I can say.

I Am SO Sick of Wind

Political and atmospheric! The wind has been 25-30 MPH on and off for the last month. Pioneers used to kill themselves in despair because of the wind here on the north prairie, and I can see why. That on top of the drought is very demoralizing. The only good thing is that the temperatures have remained moderate to even a little cool, or it would be far dryer than it is. As it stands, there are ranchers who are contemplating selling their cattle in a matter of weeks because they are out of hay; the pastures just have not grown. People have stopped seeding. We are headed to 1929; I can feel it.

Politically, oh Lord. The spit is hitting the fan with the votes in Florida and Michigan. Please recall that the democratic national committee in all of its wisdom decided to punish the voters of these states because they chose to have their primaries early (ohhhh, naughty states). Now there are lawsuits being filed to force the DNC to count these votes. I don't know how a committee can chose to disinfranchise the voters of entire states; it seems as unamerican as superdelegates and the frickin electoral college. What ever happened to one man, one vote? They were going to have a revote, but Senator Obama decided to put the ix-nay on that. I wonder why. I guess its because he's scared she'd win. He's a politician after all and wants to win at all costs. Just because he gets up there and spouts change doesn't mean he isn't just like all the others. You have to have a huge ego and supreme self-confidence to run for president, so his "I'm just like you" stuff is just a little precious. He is NOT like me. I was NOT the president of the Harvard Review. Don't get me wrong, I am inspired by his language, his speeches are pure poetry. But its like meringue, tastes good and all, but its basically air. I don't know if inspiration can take the place of solid plans. I guess we will know in November.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

On Getting Older

Remember the friend with the fedora I wrote about on the 17th? I just found out that he died of a heart attack almost a year ago, and my college roommate has cancer. It is a shock to hear that kind of information from your peers. He was 54, she is 52, my age. I've become used to the deaths of my friends' parents, and my parents are gone, but damn. This is tough. A few weeks ago a local woman much younger than I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Damned cancer. I've had way too much experience with it. God bless my friend and her family.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

I Still Hate George Bush.

Yesterday in our local paper there was another huge picture of our Feckless Leader holding hands with a Smirking Saudi prince (after they blew him off over the whole "please pump some more oil, pretty pretty pretty please, oh please, its my legaceeeee" request). Just to the left of that photo was an article captioned "Gay Weddings Expected to Increase." I can't wait until he is out of office and can move in with the House of Saud permanently. I have had about enough of him.

I have a violently Republican acquaintance who told me about a bumper sticker he was dying to have that said "My gun has killed less people than Ted Kennedy's car." I told him he could substitute "Laura Bush" for that too but he doesn't believe it. I'm looking forward to the day that entire rotten, corrupt bag of weevils leaves Washington.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Indiana Jones and the Wonders of Nostalgia

I have to admit I have been madly in love with Indiana Jones since I first saw him on the screen when I was in college. There was a herd of of who hung out together and every time we got an opportunity to show the movie to someone else, or got bored, or just needed a fix, we'd go see "Raiders of the Lost Ark." I probably spent the equivalent of my spring tuition (about 168 bucks back in those far-gone days) in tickets to this movie. My roommate's brother wore his Indie fedora with great panache and everywhere you loked you could see one of those leather jackets. I still get a kick out of seeing that movie. Indiana and I are much older now, and I think seeing the next installment is going to be like seeing an old friend. I know it will make me think of those college kids from long ago, and wish we could be sitting together in a theater in Fargo, North Dakota, on a warm spring night, silly and young and smelling of beer and enjoying ourselves without a care in the world. Bonnie, Kevin, Brian, Andy: Wherever you may be, I love you all.

Friday, May 16, 2008

Another of the Old Ones Takes His Leave

We got word yesterday that our cousin Jens Tennefos has passed away, one of the last of the Greatest Generation, or probably slight post Greatest Generation, but a Good Generation, nonetheless. I didn't know him well, but he always remembered me and asked fondly after my folks. He had more charm than almost anyone I know. He was in the state legislature for many years, and I, as a member of a labor group for state employees, went to lobby the legislature on a regular basis. Cousin Jens would ask me to sit on the floor of the Senate with him, asked about Mom and Dad and all the brothers and sisters, and anyone else he could think of to avoid discussing the dismal, subsistance wages paid to a great many state employees. I did remind him once that I had voted him when he ran for his first term to the legislature, and his lack of sympathy for my cause pretty much made certain that I would never cast another republican ballot again (which I haven't). He just grinned his charming grin, gave me a hug, and told me to look him up next time I got to town, and I grinned back with great affection and not the least shred of animosity. Rest in peace Jens, and manga takk.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

I created this blog because I hate George Bush

and in direct response to his Hitler and appeasement references in Israel. How hateful can he get! People whose mommies' family has ties to the Nazis shouldn't be throwing Neville Chamberlain references around. George Bush has always reminded me of the nasty little rich kid on the playground that nobody liked, but they hung out with anyway because he had all the good toys. Now, if I never post another post, I will have gotten this out of my system.